got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
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