Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
