In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
