Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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