Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
