Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Randomize
