fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
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