a queef is a wish your heart makes.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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