It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
