rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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