I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Randomize
