I could have mohawked her pubes.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize