You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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