do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize