Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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