He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Girls should come with a carfax report
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
