Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
