I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
