she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I checked into jail on foursquare
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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