Screwed.edu
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Can I color on your dick again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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