Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize