she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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