Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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