The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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