Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I'm bleeding and have questions
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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