I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
