I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
