Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
