i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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