I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize