I bet he comes in French.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
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My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
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