omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
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She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize