She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize