All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
