I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
