you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
