dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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