VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Terrible idea I love it
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize