i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
