ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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