Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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