I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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