I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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