I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I can tuck mytits in my pants
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
