I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
