She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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