Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
