I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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