it's too hot outside to masturbate.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
nutella sex= disaster
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
