Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize