They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Damn victory sex feels great
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize