The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize